21 Days of Semen retention
Welcome to your program to connect to your sexual energy and your personal power. Within this program we will take you through 21 days of abstaining from the usual way of having sex and orgasm with ejaculation. We will be guiding you through the reasons why this practice can benefit you and so many areas of your life, and how to get started with creating changes around your beliefs, habits and feelings around masturbation, your genitals, your body as a whole and your potential as an energetic and creative being.
Our sexual energy is our creative energy. We are programmed to use this energy to pro create from our animalistic and primal drive to reproduce, but there is so much more magic and power from this energy centre that many of us are not aware of. When a man ejaculates or a woman has an orgasm through clitoral stimulation it depletes them of their energy, their life force and creative potential. Sex in the western world has become more about pleasure, instant gratification, a stress reliever, a way of releasing, but we are releasing and giving away our power, energy, and potential. We have also been moulded by a culture that teaches about sex through pornography, especially the millennial generation. There’s so much misinformation about what men and women want and how they should perform for the other sex. This had led to a need for more intense ways to feel aroused, to reach climax, to feel any sensation in the genital area. The lengths people must go to, to feel that high becomes insatiable. The outward and external search for power and joy through status, material possessions, wealth, thrills and pleasures of sex, drugs, food, validation through sexual interactions, love and connection through unconscious sex actually leads to a leaking of our true internal power and we end up feeling exhausted, demotivated, uninspired, disconnected, lonely, unfulfilled, unhealthy and desensitised
Practicing semen retention and abstaining from having an orgasm through genital stimulation is a great place to start to connect your full energy stream, connect to your power and feel truly inspired and aligned with your creative projects, completely connected to yourself and others from a place of love not lack. Some of the areas you could benefit are Improved health, manifesting, more physical energy, creativity, improved sex life and connection with your partner, master your own internal power, spiritual development, more pleasure and more sensitivity in your sexual organs, deeper orgasms, full body orgasms. It can also help with premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction.
A critical aspect of sexual transmutation taught in many ancient philosophies from Asia and India is seminal retention. Seminal retention is the practice of abstaining from ejaculation. These ancient traditions believed that they could cultivate their life force through seminal retention to achieve greater vitality and longevity. Both the nutrients within the semen as well as the life essence with the sperm itself, when retained, can be used, and absorbed back into your body to support your higher energy centres, your nervous system, and your brain.
Have you ever noticed an immediate reduction in energy after ejaculating? Perhaps you have observed a slight sense of depression as well? The French term La petite mort translates to “the little death” and is used to describe a sexual orgasm. What if men weren’t designed to release their seed (except for procreation)?
The younger you are, the more life force you have. As you get older, this life force depletes.
Teenagers: Sex once a day
In your 20s: Once every three days
In your 30s: Once a week
In your 40s: Once every two weeks
In your 60s: Once every 100 days
Signs of excessive ejaculation include chronic fatigue, stiffness in the joints, and pain in your knees and lower back. And for sexual energy transmutation, these frequency ranges are probably too generous.
Pornography
Porn is a new problem that plagues the latest generations. Here, however, we can turn to scientific research. Studies show that pornography rewires the brain, making it less connected and less active. Porn usage easily becomes compulsive and addictive. Masturbation and pornography create problems with arousal, sexual desire, and sexual performance. But you can try it for yourself, if you’ve been an avid porn user, begin to remove it from your life and see what happens. You may want to start by changing the type of porn you watch, such as watching a couple that are in a loving relationship, perhaps even giving tantric massage to each other and ween off completely. But if you can completely cut it out for the next 21 days we’ve a feeling you won’t look back. From the context of sexual transmutation, pornography is perhaps the greatest destroyer of sexual energy in men.
What you’ll need?
Ritualistic space. You will want to create a little space in your home or wherever you’re staying. This will be a place for you to come and set your intentions each day, exercise, breathe, meditate, explore your body and follow your practices and rituals around this sacred practice of connecting back to your full sexual power. You might want to create a sacred Alter with items to help with your practices and intentions. Ritualistic Items, Symbolic Objects for Male Sexual power, holding the male phallic symbol of masculine power for men and a sacred yoni statue or sculpture for women. Crystals, Clothing, Jewellery, Pictures, Candles and scented oils specific to you and connecting to your sexual power. Anything that you feel is important for you on this journey to set the space in the most sacred way.
You might want to abstain from all forms of stimulation and arousal in this time frame. No to masturbation, no to sex. Or you could approach this by using masturbation and arousal to embrace it, but just no ejaculation, bring the energy up and integrate it into the body. It will be important to stay away from being overly stimulated whilst doing this, bringing yourself to around 50-65% pleasure only.
Practices
Microcosmic Orbital breathing
Begin with Belly Breathing, settling into a relaxed breath and posture. Place the tip of your tongue lightly at the roof of the mouth just behind the front teeth. Beginning at the bottom of the torso, imagine a ball of light. As you inhale, bring the ball of light up the front of the torso, over the head, and as you exhale follow the light down the back of the spine. This completes one cycle. Continue this orbital breathing process with a natural relaxed breathing. After spending some time with the flow going in one direction, reverse the flow of the breath and light so that it goes up the back / spine on inhalation, over the head, and on exhalation, down the front. As the light moves around the orbit you may notice that it appears to move more freely in one direction than the other or that there are subtle disruptions or ‘bumps’ along the way of the breath. Practicing this technique over time results in a smooth flow of breath in both directions. Should your mind wander slowly and gently bring it back to watching the light’s orbit synchronized with the breath. You can also try sucking up through the base and pelvic floor as the light reaches the top of your head, hold for one count and as the light gets back down to the base, releasing and repeat.
Practice daily, Five to ten minutes to begin with, or whatever is comfortable. Lengthen the time as appropriate. You can do this seated or standing, but the seated lotus position is usually the best for this practice, with the spine long and lengthened. The torso should be stacked up neatly, so each chakra point in the body has as much flow as possible up and down the spine. So no slumping over or rounded shoulders.
Genital Massage. This practice can be a nice way to get to know your genital area to increase sensitivity in this area and build up some trust after perhaps using this area in a slightly disregarding way. You can begin with intentions to speak to your genitals, ask how they feel, what they must tell you, what do they need and like? You can begin by touching the surrounding areas gently, inquisitively asking your body for permission to be touched. Notice the sensations and what kind of touch you like, notice how gently you can touch yourself and see how slowly you can go. Give yourself time and care, creating a ritualistic space and approach to this new way of touching your genitals. You can really explore all the different parts of your genitals, not just the overly sensitive areas, and not just to stimulate pleasure.
Qi-gong, Yoga, Dance. It will be important to move your energy around your body. Qi-Gong is a wonderful practice that compliments this 21 day practice. Qigong (pronounced chee-gong) is an ancient Chinese exercise and healing technique that involves meditation, controlled breathing, and movement exercises. Qigong is sometimes translated as "vital energy cultivation" or "mastery of your energy." There are many forms of qigong practiced throughout the world. Some of these forms involve breathing and meditation to promote spirituality and health while others are more vigorous and include martial arts exercises. Tai chi, a widely practiced mind-body exercise, is sometimes referred to as a form of qigong because it "cultivates, moves and helps manage Qi,". You can begin with 10-20 minutes each day of this practice and Yoga or dance can also be an addition or alternative to include.
Journaling. You may find it helpful to journal throughout this process. You can keep a note of the way you feel each day, notice any new feelings or sensations. You may also find that some emotions are present. You may notice an anxiety or agitation and you can journal about these feelings to understand yourself a little better and what needs you’re fulfilling.
What to expect?
Week 1
After your last ejaculation, your body can take up to 17 days to get back into full homeostasis (balance). After around 3 days you may start to notice a little more clarity, vitality, and fire in the belly to get things done, feeling excited about projects or adventures. You may have noticed before that a little brain fog and fatigue, but it may be such a normal state for you that you had not been aware of any changes. You may start to notice a little more energy flowing through the body by day 7, bringing a little electric charge and tingles to the fingers.
Implementing the practices in this time frame and throughout the whole 21 days will be important as not all of this new energy will be used, so you can help to move it around the body, allow it to integrate and also burn anything off that leads to an agitated state.
Week 2
This week might start to feel a little more challenging. You might be feeling a little horny or fidgety. There might be a draw to masturbate or have sex with your partner, and that’s ok, if you feel like you can remain focused and committed to this practice whilst still enjoying stimulation, that’s great, but it may help some people to refrain from anything that will take you to the point of no return. The practices will help with this to slow things down, last longer and hold off from the usual release. It will be worth it. You may feel the need to do more intense exercise in this period such as running or just jumping around to shake off any agitations and frustrations. Check in with your intentions around this practice, why did you begin? Why is it important for you? What will you learn and gain? You may start to notice you start to radiate as a person, not just the way you look but energetically other people will be drawn to you and feel attracted to you and your energy. This could be within business a relationship your friendships. Others will feel the power in you, the feeling that you don’t throw away your power unconsciously, that you love and value yourself and this is attractive.
Week 3
If you’ve been used to ejaculating weekly or even more frequently, you should really start to notice a shift here. If you were a weekly wonder then you were always just going up and down from ejaculation, energy depletion back to homeostasis, so this will feel new. You may feel more powerful but not in a controlling, overbearing way, more of an internal power just radiating and emanating out. You may feel more depth of your own presence, more in your body and more consistently aligned with your life purpose and what it is you want to create. You may have more clarity now around areas of your life that you had previously been leaking energy, through sex, food, alcohol. It can really bring about a deeper connection to the people you love and people that you meet, allowing you to be more connected to your heart and perceive people from a soul level rather than as objects or processions. You may notice an increase in energy and an increase in pleasure when you do stimulate your genitals.
Week 4
If you wanted to continue for another week this can be an incredible phase to bring you a sense of true fulfilment, not needing to rely on any external pleasures such as sugar, drugs, people. It can become a really easeful power, a kind of calm and embodied presence and heightened awareness of your body as a whole and all of your energy centres fully connected, allowing you to truly master your full energy stream and not feel so driven by the head. You will experience a new baseline for homeostasis. From here you may want to decide whether you need to ejaculate and begin a journey to find out how frequently you need to release to create the perfect flow and balance for you. You may then want to do this whole process again at some point in the future. You can judge when you feel you hit a plateau with the benefits, or when you feel you have become a little despondent or disconnected again.
Reasons why you might find it hard to go for longer, to retain your semen. This section can also be of great help for men that struggle with Premature Ejaculation
1. Poor masturbation habits. This could be that over the years you’ve only ever masturbated to reach the orgasm, and it’s been fast and furious. If you’re used to ejaculating within minutes through your masturbation memory this will be in your nervous system and will likely lead to a harder time lasting for longer and a harder time enjoying pleasure without actually ejaculating. This just trains the sexual response system to know one way. Slow down, if you previously took 5 minutes, take 10 minutes, then 15. See how much slower you can go.
2. Tension in the body especially the pelvis, lower back and the stomach area can lead to a quick ejaculation response. Tension puts us into a shallow breath way of breathing that contracts the whole body and doesn’t allow for a full flow of energy, leaving the sexual energy running mainly through the base and into the genitals. It leads to being less present and having less control over where, when and how we direct our flow. Slow everything down, slow the breathing down with long, belly breathing. Take time to stretch, massage and release the muscles in the body and actively see if you can release areas in the body whilst masturbating and/or having sex.
3. Pornography. Certain habits with pornography can lead to a link between cumming and pleasure, orgasm equals pleasure or the desired result. SO much of the porn we see is very much orgasm drive, there’s so much focus on the big climax. There’s also often lots of close up shots of the genitals which creates a disconnect between sex and the deep connection between two people, and the other parts of the body that create this beautiful and sacred union, with pleasure still involved.
4. It can help to put focus on different parts of the body whilst your genitals are gently being stimulated. It’s so easy to get consumed by those wonderful feelings down below, but there’s lots going on whilst you’re having sex or masturbating. What are you feeling in the rest of your body? What is your breath doing? Can you just look into the eyes of your lover? Take the first ten minutes extremely slow, even to stillness, just holding your genitals or laying with your partner staring into each other’s eyes. Focus on slowing down the breathing, breathe in sync with your partner, after that it may feel a little easier to continue at that pace. You’ve now met from a place of connection, or set the intention of going slowly and using all of your senses, taking the focus away from the base alone. Visualise raising the energy up through from the base, up the spine, into the heart and up out of the top of the head and back down again, like a juicy energy stream trickling up and down your body.
5. Emotional blocks, mental tension, beliefs. Our bodies will behave in ways that are a physical manifestation of what is happening for us emotionally. If we have lots of shame and inhibitions around our bodies and sex it can lead to a less fulfilling relationship to our bodies and our lover. If we’re putting pressure on ourselves to perform, or we fear we’ll fail and be rejected, fear of intimacy, avoidance of connection and/or relationship issues this can lead to tension in the body, too much time in the head, shallow breathing and a lack of ability to slow things down and be more present. It can help to work with a coach, sex and relationship therapist or tantra therapist to work on any deeper layers of emotional blocks, traumas, wants and don’t wants alongside the physical practices.
Good luck with your personal journey, be patient and kind to yourself as well as reconnecting to your intentions and the reason why you’ve committed to this practice.
WOULD YOU LIKE 1-1 GUIDANCE TO CONNECT TO YOUR BODY AND/OR YOUR PARTNER IN A MORE INTIMATE & MEANINGFUL WAY?
